You've likely had days when you feel on top of the world and days when you seriously doubt your self-worth. This is the intricate dance of self-esteem, where your self-perception can shift from moment to moment.

How you feel about yourself oscillates with the ebb and flow of your daily experiences. Whether it's a casual compliment sending you soaring or a backhanded remark making you question your value, your self-esteem responds to the world around you — and you to it.  

If you struggle with low self-image, you’re not alone. Understanding what it is and what causes it are the first steps to learning how to improve your self-esteem. 

What’s self-esteem? 

Self-esteem is deeply rooted in self-worth. It’s your perception of who you are and what you’ve accomplished, your inner monologue of encouragement or self-doubt.  

Self-esteem is often swayed by external influences (like social media or your upbringing). While this internal narrative, also called “self-talk,” can be a breeding ground for negativity, it can also encourage self-validation if you work to filter out unnecessary comparisons to others or harsh self-criticism.  

While your self-esteem is your core perception of your inherent value, your self-confidence is your belief in your skills and talents. You can feel confident in your ability to ace a test while simultaneously struggling with your self-worth internally. Life experiences — including past trauma, your childhood, and your environment — impact self-esteem. Self-confidence, on the other hand, develops over time through repeated experiences and growing competence. Although the two concepts are different, they’re connected: Being more confident can improve how you feel about yourself.

Why is self-esteem important? 

Self-esteem and body image are internal barometers of your self-care. While it's natural for self-esteem to ebb and flow, consistently low self-esteem is an alarm bell indicating that certain things in your life may be harming your well-being. Conversely, high self-esteem can suggest you’re taking good care of yourself. Perhaps a friend who’s always putting you down drives your insecurities, or a great night’s rest gives you the energy to practice a little extra self-care. 

Self-esteem is nuanced, and its subtle shifts often go unnoticed. That’s why you need to consciously pause and gauge how different aspects of your life impact how you feel about yourself. 

Considering others’ self-esteem is important, too. Recognizing signs of self-doubt in your family and friends can encourage mutual support and understanding. And when you offer someone a shoulder to lean on, chances are they’ll return the favor and help raise you up when you’re feeling down.  

What does low self-esteem look like? 

When you have low self-esteem, it affects many areas of your life, shaping your choices, behaviors, and mental well-being. To assess whether you (or a loved one) fall into this category, be on the lookout for the following signs:  

Social isolation 

If you have low self-esteem, you may shy away from being social. This can be related, at least partially, to introversion — which is perfectly healthy. But social isolation as a consequence of low self-esteem is often due to the fear of being judged or feeling like you’re not good enough around others. You might worry you don’t add enough value in group settings, which couldn’t be farther from the truth.  

Being critical of yourself  

If you have low self-esteem, chances are you’re highly critical of yourself. This is more than just a fleeting thought about what you could've done better or should improve for next time. It’s persistent self-talk casting doubt across all your achievements, wants, and desires. You may worry about minor mistakes for days and have difficulty accepting compliments.  

Depression 

Low self-esteem and depression don’t always go hand-in-hand, but they’re commonly comorbid. Depression is a serious mental health condition that includes persistent feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness and a loss of interest in what you once enjoyed. And it can cause low self-esteem to fall even lower, creating a vicious cycle. 

Anxiety 

The anxiety associated with low self-esteem goes beyond daily life’s typical worries to profound, encompassing concerns. These serious mental health symptoms may include stress about being perceived negatively by others, making mistakes in public, or being ridiculed. This anxiety goes above and beyond what most people experience daily, infringing on your ability to function.  

Lack of ambition  

Setting goals can feel overwhelming when you have low self-esteem. This fear is two-fold: It’s about not achieving the goals and the judgment that may accompany that. This lack of ambition causes personal and professional stagnation that may lead you to settle instead of striving for what you deserve.  

Staying inside your comfort zone 

Venturing into the unknown requires self-esteem. If yours is low, familiarity will likely feel more comfortable than trying something new. This avoidance includes physical spaces, activities, and emotional risks, limiting personal growth.  

Factors that lower your self-esteem 

A range of factors can lower your self-worth, and it’s essential to identify these triggers in order to overcome them. Recognizing when and how your self-esteem takes a hit will help you develop strategies for proactively managing your triggers and counteracting their impact. 

If you have low self-esteem, boost your self-compassion by watching out for these common culprits:  

• Abuse: Many different types of abuse can severely damage your self-worth. Emotional, physical, and sexual mistreatment leaves scars on the body and the mind, and can make you question your identity. 

• Life events: Have you experienced something difficult like divorce, death, or unemployment? These things can all contribute to lower self-esteem and feelings of instability. 

• Mindset: If your self-talk is negative, it may lower your self-esteem. Focusing on your shortcomings and having a persistently negative inner dialogue can erode your confidence and contribute to feelings of anxiety. 

• Society: Feeling pressured and unable to live up to society’s standards of lifestyle, appearance, or finances — particularly those advertised by celebrities and influencers — can contribute to low self-esteem.   

How to build self-esteem 10 ways  

Learning how to build self-confidence and self-esteem isn’t easy, but it’s worth it. Navigating this journey requires introspection and action, but thankfully, there are many transformative (and proven) strategies to try. 

If you’re wondering how to improve your self-esteem as a woman, man, or non-binary person, use these tips:  

1. Try positive affirmations: Repeated daily, positive affirmations serve as powerful reminders. Create and use personalized mantras to recalibrate your mindset and swap negative thoughts for positive self-talk. 

2. Avoid comparison: Everyone is on their own unique journey, so why compare yourself to others? Avoid social media’s highlight reels to nurture genuine self-acceptance and compassion. 

3. Celebrate your successes: Recognize and take pride in your achievements, big and small. This creates a feeling of accomplishment, strengthening your self-worth.  

4. Nurture positive relationships: Surround yourself with supportive friends and family who value and respect you. The way other people treat you can have a shockingly large impact on how you see yourself. 

5. Try therapy: Speak with a licensed therapist or psychologist to address deep-rooted beliefs contributing to low self-esteem — and address mental health concerns. They can offer tools and perspectives to help you feel better and support you along the way. 

6. Stop people-pleasing: Know your worth, prioritize your needs, and understand that you can’t be everything to everyone. The most important opinion of yourself is your own. 

7. Step outside your comfort zone: Challenge yourself to embrace new experiences. This builds resilience, and when you succeed, you’ll feel more confident and self-assured. 

8. Forgive yourself: Are you holding onto self-criticism and regret? Let it go, forgive yourself, and move on.  

9. Set boundaries: Consider your limits and assert them in your relationships with others. Setting healthy boundaries is an excellent way to protect your emotions and bolster self-respect. 

10. Release negative people: Remember — your environment, including the people around you, influences your self-perception. If someone in your life consistently makes you feel less than, reconsider whether they deserve to spend time with you.  

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