Sex
Common Non-sexual Turn-Ons That Might Surprise You
Deep talks, uniforms, compliments, creativity, musical talent — this comprehensive list of non-sexual turn-ons will get your motor running.
By Quinn · December 18, 2023 · 6 min read
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Your partner in a brand new suit.
Your sexy neighbor's thick-rimmed glasses.
Your instructor's intelligence.
Your first love's perfume.
If you've ever had a moment where something expected turned you on, you know that non-sexual turn-ons are real. From clothing to scent and things like music and passion, these turn-ons are powerful foreplay that, in some cases, are more arousing than physical attraction.
Because the brain is our biggest sexual organ, arousal isn't always linked to seeing or thinking explicit things. Here's what turns other people on outside the bedroom — and what might turn you on, too.
A non-sexual turn-on is any stimulus or action that arouses sexual excitement without being directly associated with sex. Also called atypical arousal, these stimuli vary wildly, and you likely know exactly what yours are.
Non-sexual turn-ons are those random things that make your heart race or your underwear damp that you can't necessarily place as sexual. From seemingly ordinary moments like your partner cooking a meal to eye contact, a British accent, or watching someone expertly play a sport, anything goes.
Why does this happen? Human beings are intricate, and various elements across diverse contexts can trigger your emotional and psychological senses. Sometimes, it's the subtle stuff that's the most impactful.
Non-sexual turn-ons are all about dopamine, the feel-good neurotransmitter released when something strikes a chord, even if it's not blatantly romantic or sexual. Have you ever felt on top of the world grooving to your favorite song or euphoric after a great workout? That's dopamine working its magic. (It’s released during orgasms, too.)
When it comes to what turns you on, it can be almost anything, not just the steamy stuff. Sometimes, that song or someone's belly laugh, smile, or high self-esteem trigger that dopamine release.
Your past experiences can also play a role in non-sexual turn-ons if you have positive memories associated with particular stimuli. Similarly, being in a positive emotional state can make you more receptive to experiencing pleasure from non-sexual stimuli.
If you suffer from low libido, identifying your non-sexual turn-ons and incorporating them into your daily life more frequently may even help boost desire. It’s also a great way to foster deeper connection with your partner without physical intimacy.
When it comes to non-sexual turn-ons, what gives you butterflies may leave someone else feeling indifferent. These subtle triggers are unique and shaped by personal experiences and psychological makeup.
Here's a list of some of the most common non-sexual turn-ons:
If you're wondering what turns a man on non-sexually — or women or non-binary folks — fragrance is big. Smelling a certain fragrance can transport you back to a favorite sexual (or non-sexual) memory or person. The right scent is like a signature, leaving a lasting impression that sometimes lasts for years.
There's something about a well-tailored suit. For many people, it goes beyond the cut, feel, and fabric to suggest stellar self-care, power, and sophistication. A great suit is a common non-sexual turn-on for women and people with vaginas.
That deep, husky voice people use when they first wake up? It turns a lot of people on. Morning voice just sounds sexier, and it's often a genuine reminder of intimacy.
For some people, nothing's hotter than someone who can whip up a delicious meal. This shows off their skills and care to nourish themselves and others. The way to many people's hearts is undoubtedly through their stomachs.
A pair of spectacles has a surprising effect on many people. For some, glasses hint at intellectual depth, and for others, they look super cute.
Laughter is the universal language of fun and happiness, and it's sexy, too. Someone who makes others laugh is great to be around and makes everyday life more exciting.
In the age of text messages (and sexting), handwritten notes are particularly thoughtful. They evoke a sense of old-school charm if you're into that kind of thing.
A sincere compliment can light up someone's day, showing appreciation and attentiveness. Even if there's no ulterior motive, the person doing the compliment still might get lucky.
Conversations that transcend small talk are incredible bonding experiences. These talks display depth and vulnerability and often heighten sexual and emotional attraction between people.
Someone who's well-read showcases a sexy thirst for knowledge. Their varied references, insights, and diverse perspectives can also make conversations more interesting and mentally stimulating.
Whether it's art, music, writing, or another creative form of expression, creativity is hot. It's a window into another person's talent and capabilities.
Observing someone maintain close, healthy relationships with their people can be sexually attractive because it indicates care and loyalty.
Seeing someone in uniform, such as a police officer, firefighter, or medical uniform, is a popular non-sexual turn-on. For some, uniforms symbolize sexy principles like discipline, purpose, and commitment.
If you're into the idea of chivalry, it isn't dead. Good manners reflect a strong upbringing and respect for others that's appealing to many people.
Engaging with an intelligent mind can be stimulating, and some people need intellectual stimulation to feel sexual attraction. Intelligence is challenging and helps you see the world from multiple angles, which might be the spark you need.
If acts of service are your love language, you know those small, thoughtful gestures speak volumes and might even get you in the mood. Your partner may pick up your favorite snacks or fill up your car's gas tank without you mentioning it's low. Whatever it is, it makes you feel appreciated.
There's something deeply attractive for many people about a person who has goals and the drive to achieve them. It's about professional success and determination to grow and enjoy life.
Playing an instrument or singing well is a non-sexual turn-on for many. Sharing a love of music with someone deepens connection, and watching someone on stage can be next-level attractive.
Witnessing someone treat strangers with genuine kindness can be heartwarming. It shows character and suggests they're compassionate toward everyone they encounter, an admirable trait.
Finding someone who genuinely listens and makes you feel heard and validated can be challenging, and that’s why active listening is attractive.
What gets your heart racing isn't always obvious. Your sexual and non-sexual turn-ons are as unique as you are, whether you're a uniform person or someone with eyes for humor and talent.
To keep exploring your senses and elevate your sex life, try Quinn's audio erotica. Quinn's content covers diverse topics, from LGBTQ+ to fetishes, kinks, BDSM, and much more, with arousing playlists to suit every mood — and every turn-on.
Quinn is an app created by women for the world. Download the app for iOS or Android today to browse thousands of narrated sex stories and guided masturbation sessions.
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